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Do you get happy when a meeting has been canceled or when you can leave a party early? If you're nodding your head in agreement, this probably means that you're much better in a one-on-one interaction versus a group setting. In layman's terms - you're an introvert. As an introvert, your idea of a good time is probably more in line with a glass of wine and a good movie, rather than going out with a bunch of coworkers for a Tuesday night happy hour. However, if you're in search of love and prefer to stay in rather than go out, it can be difficult to find a potential match.
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There are a of reasons why introverts shut down. A lack of understanding of the possible reasons may lead to relationship and friendship fallouts. To better understand this matter, here are 10 experts and their insights on why introverts shut down. Because introverts are already over-stimulated mentally, they are mindful of their ever-draining mental batteries in certain situations.
Many introverts spend a lot of time pretending to be more outgoing in a world that favors extraversion. Pretending takes its toll though, mentally and emotionally.
Introverts who are really self-aware will have a finely tuned low-battery warning al and will deploy their necessary recharging strategies before they become completely depleted. These strategies will include various ways to mentally or physically withdraw as recharging is a necessarily quiet process. Timely recharging often prevents complete shut-down but will often cause frustration in those around them.
This is the difference between plugging in for a quick battery top-up and needing a complete recharge! Like our smart devices, once the screen is blank, a certain level of recharging is needed before normal service can be d.
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It varies introvert to introvert but here are a few. Astute Introverts will ensure that they are sufficiently charged before engaging in these situations and will have their escape plans at the ready. Here one minute, gone the next!
Related: 12 Best Jobs for Introverts. We all fall somewhere along the introversion-extraversion spectrum — ranging from introverts to ambiverts to extraverts.
People closer to the introversion end need less external stimulation to be in an optimal state relative to those closer to the extraversion end. This may reflect naturally higher levels of arousal in the brain of introverts relative to extraverts. If we turn the dial above this volume, we feel overstimulated, overwhelmed, or exhausted. Introverts and extraverts also appear to differ in where they turn their attention and what drives their reward systems.
Turning their attention outward rather than inward may be more effortful and less rewarding than it would be for an extravert. And doing so may lead to feelings of fatigue, overwhelm, or exhaustion. Introverts often find themselves needing more time and space for rest, inward reflection, and recharge — more time alone, quieter or stillness, or more time in environments or situations with lower stimulation.
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Because introversion-extraversion is just one of 5 to 6 personality dimensions, and because other aspects of our biology and biography affect what gives us energy and what takes energy away, different things will shut different introverts down. For example, if you are both introverted and shy, you may shut down faster if you have to lead meetings and speaking events relative to someone who is introverted and not shy. Or, if you are an introvert who is high in openness and agreeableness, you may get energy from engaging with other people in situations where an introvert lower in those dimensions would tap out.
Sherrie Campbell. They need to need to be quiet, to be to themselves so they can detox their sensitive system. Their shut-down is temporary but necessary. Introverts need to refuel to function. Further, introverts are more sensitive and aware than most others.
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People tend to think of introverts and extroverts as to how talkative or outgoing someone is. That is part of what introverted or extroverted looks like, but it has more to do with where and how people process information. Extroverts process information outside of themself: by talking, writing, etc. On the other hand, introverts process information internally: by thinking through something, by investigating on their own how they are feeling, etc. When a person is getting overwhelmed, they have a lot of information they can process.
For an introvert, this means that they need to process for themself a ificant amount of information. Others pressuring them for a response, etc. From someone outside the introvert, they are shutting down. However, to the introvert, they are trying to process what they are experiencing.
They are actually working through the problem!
The introvert needs some space and time to be able to continue a conversation, meeting, etc. Introverts are multi-takers of information.
This means introverts attend to their internal dialogue and feelings, while also noticing everything going on in their external environment. Think of it as the power save function on your computer. Be patient, sometimes it takes an introvert a little longer to respond due to mulling over all of the information, experiences, and the active ongoing dialogue in their minds.
Stonewalling is a tendency to remain quiet and immobile when disagreeing. From the outside, it can appear that the person who is stonewalling is ignoring the problem or conversation, the partners of the chronic stonewaller often imagine that the person does not care. Flint effect can be multiplied during the conflict which taxes the problem solving of even the most extroverted person. The antidote to stonewalling is self-soothing when we learn to manage the stresses of interpersonal conflict with an emotionally soothing technique such as deep breathing or a short walk, the hyperarousal dissipates and conversation about the problem topic can continue.
Introverts are people who prefer calm environments. While they might enjoy social interactions, they very much need their own quiet space too. Introverts often introvert to recharge after prolonged social interactions. Too much stimulation will overwhelm them. Oftentimes, social situations such as parties are too much for introverts, who need their own space more often than extroverts. As such, dating tend to shut down when they are overwhelmed.
They might look for a place to hide out, such as a corner or bathroom, in order to get some calm. Lisa Philyaw, MS Psychology. This can show up as avoiding events entirely, going to them but not engaging hiding in that corneror just being so in your head that you feel you can think of absolutely nothing to say. Why does this happen? We use it as a limitation, and from that place, we get exhausted, hold back, and shut down. But you can use your introversion to energize yourself and become one of the most engaging individuals.
Notice the qualities that your introversion can bring. Introverts are often expert connectors, knowing how to listen and ask questions. This makes introverts engaging; they can draw people to them with that energy.
You can also use your introversion in social settings as a means to reconnect with yourself. Notice how you are showing up at that event. You can enjoy networking and social situations if you want. You can lean into the strengths of introversion as a means to speak up instead of shut down.
Related: Best Books for Introverts. There are many differences between extroverts, introverts, and ambiverts, but there remains one primary distinction. Introverts prefer solitude more often since their brains create energy during periods of alone time, low levels of stimulation and turning inward. These periods of stimulation overwhelm, exhaust and confuse their brains.
Since the introvert brain prefers solitude to social interaction when their internal limit for socializing has been crossed into the territory of overstimulation, their brains cannot process the of sights, sounds, smells, etc. This causes introverts to essentially give up on trying to process all of the stimulation shutting down or attempt their escape, heading for the nearest exit. Introverts tend to stay away from attention and drama. They process feelings and thoughts internally and may take some time to formulate well-thought-out responses. Introverts are not reactive. However, introverts who harbor their thoughts and feelings internally may be at risk for emotional overload.
Sometimes introverts can be hard to read. They may be direct and blunt, not with the goal of offending, but just because they are direct and blunt.
To some, this could be off-putting. But there is something to be said for being able to express yourself so directly.
The Editors. That being said, it helps to know and consider why it happens in the first place. Samantha Crowe, Ph. How useful was this post? Click on a star to rate it! As you found this post useful Share it on social media! We are sorry that this post was not useful for you!
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Why do introverts shut down, according to 10 experts
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